I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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