I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
