you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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