And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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