two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
