She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Tornado booty call.. dedication
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
