bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize