I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
