i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
