Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Randomize
