peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
