i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Randomize
