But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Randomize
