O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize