So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
