i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
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