Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
