i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
