He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I deserve to be covered in dicks
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
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