great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I met the friendliest cop last night
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
