And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
