Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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