Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
