these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
