Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
