So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
