Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I want her autograph on my taint
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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