Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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