so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
