I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
