So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
