oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Randomize