Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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