i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
i think im in europe. pls send help
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
