You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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