hell yes lets make some ravioli
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Randomize
