She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Randomize
