the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
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