Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
