glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize