Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
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