who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
