Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Someone shattered a urinal.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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