if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
