Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize