Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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