can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
