did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
