Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
How external is "for external use only"?
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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