i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize