why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
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